Tag Archives: nonsense

17 signs that you’re a silent film hipster


  1. You were into films before they were cool.
  2. You hate the fact that you secretly liked The Artist.
  3. Ladies: other people think you have bobbed hair, but you know it’s a shingle. Chaps: you know you could totally rock a moustache.
  4. You start a conversation about Harrison Ford, but you get confused when someone mentions Indiana Jones
  5. You left Instagram when it ditched its square-pictures-only rule.
  6. People ask you what your favourite movie is and you say you’re sorry, but they’ve probably never heard of it.
  7. You only have a TV so you can watch your Criterions.
  8. You drink Mary Pickford cocktails out of a jam jar.
  9. Your favourite thing about the last silent film you watched? The intertitle font.
  10. When people tell you they haven’t seen a Colleen Moore picture you can’t even.
  11. Your favourite beer is G W Pabst Blue Ribbon.
  12. You love Douglas Fairbanks, but only ironically.
  13. When people ask who was the greatest silent comedian, “Keaton or Chaplin?”, you raise a disdainful eyebrow.
  14. You keep trying to make “talkies” a popular phrase among your friends.
  15. Any film made after 1916 is just too mainstream for you.
  16. You have a great vinyl collection, but it’s all Vitaphone.
  17. You can’t get into “Netflix and chill” because the silents selection is just so limited.

Marion Davies